I am feeling inspired. As I understand it books have that effect on people. What book you ask? A Homemade Life by Molly Wizenberg. You can find her at Orangette. I find her nothing short of amazing. I find myself on a sort of...self discovery. Reading her descriptions of food is like reading a romance novel, for me. My immediate defense on the subject of my weight is- I LOVE food! Do I? Do I really? Molly loves food. In that sense, food and I are merely acquaintances. If I really loved food what would I be eating? I am sure that it would not be the likes of frozen, plastic containers of low-calorie microwavable food! Is this a sign? A sign of the times? (I don't know where that came from but I liked it!) Some magical way of the world telling me if I don't want to be fat anymore maybe I should slow down. Why, day after day, do I torture myself with these frozen diet meals that don't appear to do me any good anyway. Wouldn't I be just as satisfied if I took an extra ten minutes and made something delectable like Molly's recipe for Bread Salad with cherries, goat cheese and arugula? (Not on her blog, but in her book.) It sounds divine! Goat cheese, balsamic vinegar, cherries! Honestly, aside from the cheese and the bread where are the calories?
All of the aforementioned has got me thinking, what do you love so much about food? Analyze it! I have been trying! Thinking about most everything that goes in my mouth the last two days. (Having reached a turning point in the book in the last few days.) I have even gone so far as to analyze my consumption of coffee. What is it? I am hardly some connoisseur like Jack Nicholson's character in the Bucket List, going so far as to consume coffee from beans excreted from a wild cat! I can only generally tell you the difference in the "roast" of the coffee. For all of those details, I don't particularly care. Coffee a prescription given to those who have given birth and sleep with one ear open will for the next 18 years (or longer) wake at the crack of dawn to savor every waking moment with their children. I drank coffee early on because I was from the Pacific Northwest and that was what we were supposed to drink. I was young, it was cool. I knew the lingo, even moreso now! After a stint of stomach problems I stopped drinking it from upwards of 6-8 years. Picked it up again when I was pregnant because it was hot and I could get it decaf! Coffee drinking is almost like a coming of age. Grandma did it, mom does it, doesn't that mean I am supposed to? No, I have no great snobbery about coffee. I enjoy the taste and flavors I get to add to it. I have even started making it myself. (That was a HUGE step for me!) It is what I drink on my way to work to wash away the daily grind and a good cup will last me until at least two in the afternoon.
I suppose the long and the short of it is, as a way to get back in touch with my "blog" you could be seeing more posts. This could be a good avenue to discover what exactly my food issues are. I have several more damned frozen lunches to consume so not to waste money. But, I think that food needs to start getting more interesting. I am sure that tonight, maybe even tomorrow I will have aother discovery to share. Hopefully something more exciting than my thoughts on coffee. In fact there are more, but this entry would turn into a book. So let's take it, one day at a time! Maybe tomorrow we will examine even further into the frozen wasteland that so often makes up my lunch!
Monday, July 20, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Creativity
(Another blog entry for work that I thought I would share. Soon I will get back to writing them for this site!)
“It is our very nature to create.” –Matthew Fox
It is definitely in my very nature to create. When I see an object, I wonder, “how was that made?” That is how our society has matured. It is the nature of humans to create. As a society we are constantly looking for was to make things faster, better, stronger. While there are those that are looking to expedite life, there are those of us that work in reverse, the crafters and creators of the world. When I am in that creative state I want life to slow down. I want to start from scratch. If I want instant gratification, I can go buy a basket or a sweater. But, isn’t it much more gratifying to use your own hands? Making it yourself you can produce it to your own specifications. What material will you use? A basket, made of reed? Wood? Pine needles? What yarn do you favor? Are you allergic to wool, but like the pattern? Create the item to your liking. The key is simply to create. I hear some of you saying that you aren’t artistic or creative. Hafiz tells us that “all the talents of God are within you.” Maybe you can’t knit in a straight line, or weave with reed or wool. But maybe you are the best baker on the block. Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. says “If you are called to be a street sweeper, sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.” So what I say to you is find your street sweeper. Find your art, your craft, find that passion that keeps you going. For me, it is creating all things. I always have to have my hands in the pot of creation. Currently it is still knitting. But, my loom has been calling to me for some time now. So, perhaps it is time for more cloth. Whatever it will be, I know it will be made by me!
“Only creating can make us happy. For in creating we tap into the deepest powers of self and universe and the Divine Self.” –Matthew Fox
“It is our very nature to create.” –Matthew Fox
It is definitely in my very nature to create. When I see an object, I wonder, “how was that made?” That is how our society has matured. It is the nature of humans to create. As a society we are constantly looking for was to make things faster, better, stronger. While there are those that are looking to expedite life, there are those of us that work in reverse, the crafters and creators of the world. When I am in that creative state I want life to slow down. I want to start from scratch. If I want instant gratification, I can go buy a basket or a sweater. But, isn’t it much more gratifying to use your own hands? Making it yourself you can produce it to your own specifications. What material will you use? A basket, made of reed? Wood? Pine needles? What yarn do you favor? Are you allergic to wool, but like the pattern? Create the item to your liking. The key is simply to create. I hear some of you saying that you aren’t artistic or creative. Hafiz tells us that “all the talents of God are within you.” Maybe you can’t knit in a straight line, or weave with reed or wool. But maybe you are the best baker on the block. Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. says “If you are called to be a street sweeper, sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.” So what I say to you is find your street sweeper. Find your art, your craft, find that passion that keeps you going. For me, it is creating all things. I always have to have my hands in the pot of creation. Currently it is still knitting. But, my loom has been calling to me for some time now. So, perhaps it is time for more cloth. Whatever it will be, I know it will be made by me!
“Only creating can make us happy. For in creating we tap into the deepest powers of self and universe and the Divine Self.” –Matthew Fox
Friday, May 1, 2009
A New Spin on Creation Spirituality
(This is a blog entry I recently wrote for the blog at the Franciscan Spiritual Center where I work. I thought I would share it here as well. Enjoy!)
For I want you to know how great a struggle I have for you and for those at Laodicea and for all who have not seen me face to face, that their hearts may be encouraged, being knit together in love, to reach all the riches of full assurance of understanding and the knowledge of God’s mystery, which is Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. Col 2:1-3
These Hands
These hands are the hands of those before me
The hands of generations past
Ones who taught me about needles, yarn and thread
Skills of old that are built to last.
What do they make for me?
What do they make for you?
Is this my spirituality?
Will it help me to find You?
How can it be that You are my thread?
Weaving together the times of my life?
How will You help me,
Through happiness, sadness, strife?
Embroider, knit or even crochet,
These crafts get me through my day.
They bring about a sort of calm,
Soothing to me, like a psalm.
Something inspires these hands to work,
They always need something to do.
Ever searching on their quest,
To find the everlasting You.
Original Poem by Michelle Kroll
As long as I can remember, someone in my family has been doing needlework. It has changed from generation to generation. My great-grandmother (aka Granny) was an accomplished embroiderer. Many of her works are still floating around the family. But, she was a woman-of-all-trades. She also did latch-hook rugs and crocheting too! My grandma has done mostly crochet work over the years. My mom taught me to cross-stitch, crochet and knitting. While it took a few attempts, I was learning this as a teenager, the love for it remains! Over the course of my life so far I have dabbled in all of the aforementioned crafts. I think I am like my Granny in that way. I always need to be crafting, creating works with my own hands. I feel like being a creative spirit and crafter is what defines me and therefore defines my spirituality.
For most projects there is a rhythm. It is that rhythm that creates the comfort and calmness that for some is provided by prayer. I believe that each project could be considered a prayer for the person receiving it. That is definitely the case when the object is created with specific intention for that person, making the exchange all that more delightful!
I invite you to consider what your form of prayer is. Prayer can be found in many non-traditional activities. As we learned from Mary Erickson’s entry it could be walking, mine is crafting and needlework. What is yours?
For I want you to know how great a struggle I have for you and for those at Laodicea and for all who have not seen me face to face, that their hearts may be encouraged, being knit together in love, to reach all the riches of full assurance of understanding and the knowledge of God’s mystery, which is Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. Col 2:1-3
These Hands
These hands are the hands of those before me
The hands of generations past
Ones who taught me about needles, yarn and thread
Skills of old that are built to last.
What do they make for me?
What do they make for you?
Is this my spirituality?
Will it help me to find You?
How can it be that You are my thread?
Weaving together the times of my life?
How will You help me,
Through happiness, sadness, strife?
Embroider, knit or even crochet,
These crafts get me through my day.
They bring about a sort of calm,
Soothing to me, like a psalm.
Something inspires these hands to work,
They always need something to do.
Ever searching on their quest,
To find the everlasting You.
Original Poem by Michelle Kroll
As long as I can remember, someone in my family has been doing needlework. It has changed from generation to generation. My great-grandmother (aka Granny) was an accomplished embroiderer. Many of her works are still floating around the family. But, she was a woman-of-all-trades. She also did latch-hook rugs and crocheting too! My grandma has done mostly crochet work over the years. My mom taught me to cross-stitch, crochet and knitting. While it took a few attempts, I was learning this as a teenager, the love for it remains! Over the course of my life so far I have dabbled in all of the aforementioned crafts. I think I am like my Granny in that way. I always need to be crafting, creating works with my own hands. I feel like being a creative spirit and crafter is what defines me and therefore defines my spirituality.
For most projects there is a rhythm. It is that rhythm that creates the comfort and calmness that for some is provided by prayer. I believe that each project could be considered a prayer for the person receiving it. That is definitely the case when the object is created with specific intention for that person, making the exchange all that more delightful!
I invite you to consider what your form of prayer is. Prayer can be found in many non-traditional activities. As we learned from Mary Erickson’s entry it could be walking, mine is crafting and needlework. What is yours?
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Soul Searching
Wow, the amazing power of a good, intuitive massage. The massage therapist came on glowing recommendation from a friend. It was well worth it! I was instructed to be open minded, and it takes an open mind to have this "experience." Believe me, it was more of an experience than a massage. Anything beyond 2 hours is considered an experience. Since I allowed myself to be wholly open to receive, it allowed her to make a better connection.
It started with an initial convo that consisted of basically...tell me where it hurts. After getting ready and the 'massage' starting I knew I was in for something special. She would concentrate on an area and ask me very direct questions. Questions that no outsider would have any idea. Hell, I had no idea. She was able to bring up all the issues that I know exist but that I leave hidden. You mean I am actually supposed to talk about those things, out loud? What? She mentioned that I have a need for acceptance. Yes, I know that! What do I do about it? Like she said... what would happen if I let go of all that inhibition and let loose? Would I still be loved? My answer...my husband would! I know that there are others that would. But it all boils down to fear. Fear of being lonely, fear of being disliked, fear, fear, fear! How do I start that process? But if you really want to get down to the core of it I need to find me. She saw it, I think others can see it. I equated it to being stuck in my own body in the fetal position. So my task now? To bare this person? Do I know who she is? Do you know who she is? What has happened over the course of time to keep her so hidden? I don't know! I know that I had started thinking about it prior to this experience and now I continue to think about. This is such a small part of my time with her today. She got pretty deep in my head! I know that I am already wondering when I am going to go back. I also know that I have some homework to do!
It started with an initial convo that consisted of basically...tell me where it hurts. After getting ready and the 'massage' starting I knew I was in for something special. She would concentrate on an area and ask me very direct questions. Questions that no outsider would have any idea. Hell, I had no idea. She was able to bring up all the issues that I know exist but that I leave hidden. You mean I am actually supposed to talk about those things, out loud? What? She mentioned that I have a need for acceptance. Yes, I know that! What do I do about it? Like she said... what would happen if I let go of all that inhibition and let loose? Would I still be loved? My answer...my husband would! I know that there are others that would. But it all boils down to fear. Fear of being lonely, fear of being disliked, fear, fear, fear! How do I start that process? But if you really want to get down to the core of it I need to find me. She saw it, I think others can see it. I equated it to being stuck in my own body in the fetal position. So my task now? To bare this person? Do I know who she is? Do you know who she is? What has happened over the course of time to keep her so hidden? I don't know! I know that I had started thinking about it prior to this experience and now I continue to think about. This is such a small part of my time with her today. She got pretty deep in my head! I know that I am already wondering when I am going to go back. I also know that I have some homework to do!
Friday, December 26, 2008
Arctic Blast
Well I think we are nearing the end of the Artic Blast that hit Portland this winter and Christmas. We are supposed to hit a high of 45 degrees tomorrow! Woohoo! I am looking forward to the big thaw. My poor car has been buried for 2 weeks. I welcome the opportunity to drive my car and drive it straight to a carwash!
I am glad also that Christmas is over! Sadly I am not the only one who thinks it either. Many friends and family have had a tough Christmas this year. I suppose for the majority it was blamed on the economy. I think mine was partially, but mostly mine was family. I wish so badly that our family could have ALL been together this year. There was an added layer of tension to the day that never really left. Fortunately, I had family at my house and they rotated through until about lunch time. Claire got to see some of her aunts and 2 sets of grandmas and grandpas. My family had a good Christmas. Claire's was filled with Elmo, Ethan got the camera he wanted, Brian got what he wanted and I got a new camera also. But even with all that goodness there is a certain amount of comfort in knowing that there is a new year coming.
A few things I am grateful for: all of my family, friends, my new job, and Sesame Street :)
So what is in store for 2009? I don't know! I am hoping for less snow! More family! Less feuding!
Included are several pics of the fam in the snow! And one furry little friend!
And a parting quote: "To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there." ~Barbara Bush
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Leafy Ladies
Claire got to spend part of the day with her Uncle Josh and his girlfriend Kim. I had do go to work for a while. When I came to pick her up she was helping Kim rake up leaves. Claire even had her own mini-rake. She did a good job at helping. Then we had a little fun too! She loves to play outside! Look at her, getting SO big and being such a good little helper.
Pumpkin Patch Pals
We went back to our favorite Sauvie Island pumpkin patch, THE pumpkin patch. Claire got to go on a hayride and pick out her own pumpkin. She was much more intrigued with picking out a pumpkin than I expected. We went with the Frary's. This will be Nathan's first Halloween. Claire did really well sitting and posing for daddy and uncle Todd. Mom snapped a few shots too! But here is a small movie from that day.
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